Thank You Notes


“Should I send a thank you note after my audition/callback/concert/show/meeting?”

Sometimes, yes. Much of the time, no.


For clarity, let me list all of the circumstances in which you SHOULD send a thank you note.

  1. If there is genuinely something to say thank you for.

OK. Those are all of the circumstances in which you should send a thank you note.

What should I write?

BE SPECIFIC. What exactly are you saying thank you for? How have you been impacted by the thing/word/gesture that deserves the thanks? A few well-crafted and honest sentences will do.

Is there a time limit for when it is “too late” to send a thank you note?

No! In fact, it can be really meaningful when a thank you note comes out of the blue and is received much later. That advice someone gave you 5 months (or even years) ago might have made sense in a whole new way today. Let them know.

How do I know if I should NOT send a thank you note?

If you are using your gratitude as a marketing tool, as a way to “be remembered”, as a chance to promote yourself, you have turned a generous act into a selfish act. If you are doing anything other than giving thanks to the person on the receiving end, that is a clear sign that you should not send the thank you note.


Yeah, really.